Confessions of An America Hater

Last week I received an email that contained supposed truths of the current state of the good ol’ USA. At the end of this email, I was told that if I agreed with the message contained I should pass it on. It also went on to state that if I disagreed with it and decided to delete it, then I was an America Hater. Because the message contained elements of racism, ethnic slurs, class bashing, etc., and overall turned my stomach, I deleted it. I am now–according to that email–an America Hater.

 Later that same evening I posted on a social page, responding to a friend’s post. This friend (actually, he’s an acquaintance) knows me through my association with–nah, fervent dedication to–a group of self-styled revolutionaries (I’m laughing) looking to bring greater awareness to the workings of local government. I believe my friend just naturally thought–because of that–I might be involved with the Tea Party Movement. I responded to him that I was not, and that I wouldn‘t be attending any Tea Party functions. No, I‘m not a Tea Partier.

I‘ve been involved with this group of tax repealers/reformers as a volunteer, member, and former officer, almost since its inception nearly three years ago.  I fully believe that shining the light on fraud, waste, and abuse within our local governments is the best path for me.  Many of my friends–wonderful, stand-up folks–and acquaintances ARE involved in the Tea Party Group.   I have no issue with anyone choosing to be a part of that movement.  However, I do believe there is within the Tea Party Movement (as there is with many groups) a fringe element made up of a few folks who appear to have the capability for violence.  These are the folks who are so rigid in their beliefs that they see only good vs. evil.  Their vision is in black and white (no gray tones allowed).  They are not open to discourse.  They are not open to negotiation.  They know what they don’t want (fair enough) but offer up few if any solutions.  It’s their lack of organization, to my way of thinking, that makes them dangerous.  And that makes me want to stay clear.  Moreover, having Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin promote the movement only solidifies my attitude.  (I will elaborate further on this.) 

I went on, in my post to my friend, sharing that I hoped to get back to pursuing my interests in local government watchdog activities.  For over the past year and a half I have been sidelined–‘missing in action’–what with battling cancer and going through treatments, caring full-time for my terminally ill mother, and then re-purposing my life after her passing in late December.

Some minutes later, another individual posted a response on my friend‘s page.  This individual, likely a male, was unknown to me.  He said he didn’t know who I was, or who I thought I was, but that ‘we’ must bring to an end liberal views on spending and government control over EVERYTHING in our lives.  He informed me that this government controls what we drive, what doctor we can see, and if not brought to an end, it won’t matter which local services are not delivered.   SOCIALISM WILL CONTROL EVERYONE, he warned.  He agreed that local government was important but that the news media “slants every: most stories toward the anointed [sic] one’s favor.”  Further, he accused me of obviously being incapable of seeing the “big picture,” that I was wasting my time and energy working for local results, and supposed (now, this was a giant leap) that I was for amnesty for the illegals just like “larry, mo and nancy.”    As an aside, he said that he doubted if I knew ANYTHING about Sarah Palin “that ran Alaska except what [I ] heard“–and this is why I believe the poster was male–on “PMSNBC.”  “That women [sic] (Sarah Palin is a conglomerate now?)” he said, “has more American ideals  (uh–so, let me get this straight, a wink, a “you betcha,” and “drill baby drill” are ideals?) than a million panty wastes (what the heck is a panty waste?) like you!!!!!”   Pull your head out of the sand, he demanded, and think of the future of  the children and grandchildren who will never know the life we had before socialism took over this America.   He concluded his message by saying he was sorry to hear of my Mom’s passing and then wished me a Happy Easter.

Well, color me puzzled!

I wanted to tell him that I do not celebrate Easter (in the traditional sense) because I’m not a Christian, but I figured the poor fella’ would head straight for apoplexy without passing go and without collecting $100.  So, instead, I told him that I knew who I was, and  that I  was actually the same person whom I thought I was (whew!  lucky for me!).  I suggested that he take his vitriol over to the local newspaper on-line forum.  I also said that after spewing his personal poison to me in a most unkind manner, his expression of sympathy and holiday wishes rang hollow.

Then, came another rant by the mysterious gentleman.  This time he accused me of having received a taxpayer check each week and now a taxpayer pension (which had been invested in capitalistic enterprises), but that I now want to push a socialist government.  What the hell?  I worked multiple jobs at the same time for much of the 50-plus years I worked.  For much of my work career I barely made minimum wage.  The last 15 or so years prior to retirement I worked for a hospital.  Okay, I now demand to know just where did those taxpayer monies go?  I sure could use them now!

Then he charged me with being Cuban…yeah, Cuban…well, sort of.  My screen name is Hallie Pena.  My screen name.  My nom de plume.  While he didn’t know my nationality, he said, he DID know that Pena was a Cuban name.  Really?  I knew some Penas who lived in the Southwest.  They are really nice folks.  Maybe, just maybe, he said, I could move to Cuba and bond with my buddy Fidel.  (I swear on the spaghetti box to The Flying Spaghetti Monster that  I‘ve never even been in the same room with Fidel!)  But, he warned…“don’t take your U.S. taxpayer pension with you.“  (Again:  What…the…hell?)  He wished me a good time in Havana;  informed me that they don’t have many computers; and asked me to keep in touch and let everybody know how the change was working for me.  Great:  Another anti-Obama slogan slinger.

Incoming!  Bam!  Then came another shot!  (Same unknown author.)  He wondered if I believed in partial birth abortion, just like my President Obama.

Geezus, Mary, and Joe the Plumber!  

The following day, my social page friend/acquaintance (on whose page those comments were posted) wrote me to apologize for those hateful rants.  You know, it’s pretty bad when somebody else feels compelled to apologize for your pitifully bad behavior.  

I sent a message back to my friend, and the following pretty much covers what I said:

Thanks for posting those (far kinder) words.  I was so worried that YOU as well might have been offended by my post (regarding my not wishing to participate in the Tea Party Movement).  I thought I had worded it so that anyone reading it would understand that that was MY choice.  I have no issue with anyone who supports the movement, except those who spew hatred and lies or use the movement solely for their own profit (be it notoriety, book sales, political ambitions, etc.)  As you probably know, quite a few members of our tax repeal/government reform group have attended gatherings.  Those people I know, love, and would entrust (and have entrusted) with my life.  But that fringe element, the folks whose anger reaches a fever pitch…nuh-uh.  I don’t want to be identified with individuals like that.  I don’t want to be around individuals like that.

What I found startling was the gentleman’s “leap” to instantly label me as one of those detestable liberals.  (Like a friend of mine asked the other day:  When did the word liberal get to mean something bad?)   There was that assumption of my nationality and of my values/beliefs–bizarre.  Most startling of all was the vehemence of his attack.  Actually, I found it almost comical that the fellow’s behavior mimicked that of the very fringe group I’d initially addressed.

About me:
I come from good, sturdy Eastern European peasant stock, but my birth land/homeland is the USA.  Our family still cooks traditional old country foods–mama liga, ardei implutz, plachintas, pancoves (hell, I don‘t know how to spell ‘em, just know how to cook and eat ‘em).   I suppose clinging to those traditional favorites could be viewed as suspicious behavior by some 2000s-era McCarthyite types.

Back in the ‘60s I lived in South America for a short while.   When I returned home, I worked in a community center in a black neighborhood where I was loved by my black friends and hated by many of my so-called white friends and some members of my family.  For a lot of years afterward, I lived in the Southwest.  I love Hispanic culture and the Spanish language.  I also like peppers– just about any kind–and that’s where I came up with my nom de plume:  Hallie Pena.  Many of my friends call me Hallie nowadays, rather than by my real name.  I guess it better suits my personality.  Some days I wish it WERE my real name, especially when bills arrive in the mail.  Where IS that damned check from all those taxpayers?

Where I stand:
Politically speaking, I’m a conservative when it comes to fiscal matters, a liberal when it comes to social concerns.  I’ll admit, that’s a pretty schizophrenic political stance.   The one good thing to come out of that, though, is that I am able to look at a situations from more than one viewpoint.  Sometimes that is a curse.
 
Term limits:   Term limits might very well help.  Those folks who end up serving (if that’s what you call it) us for 20-30 years get far too comfortable, too cozy, too dependent upon the kindness of strangers (the stinkin’ lobbyists–you know, those folks who fill the campaign coffers and stroke the egos of myopic idiots).

Campaign finance reform:  Everybody talks about it.  Nothing is done.  I heard a couple weeks ago that the woman running for the California governorship had already spent $35 million so far on the primary.  (Those dollars may have come from her own pocket.)  Hmm…what would be the payoff for such an investment?

Illegals:  Yes, we do need to be protecting our borders.  Can’t help but believe, though, that U.S. businesses are the chief driver in the wave of illegals.  Those businesses engaged in the hiring of illegals need to be fined heavily.  Perhaps some of their CEOs/upper echelon types need to serve some jail time–dunno’.  At the same time, I’m unclear about what is hype and what is not about which services illegals receive.  As far as healthcare goes, I wonder what Jesus’ approach would have been if two persons were in the street bleeding–an illegal and a citizen.  Would he have made a distinction as to whom he gave care?  It’s difficult for me to find fault with individuals who are seeking a better way of life for themselves, their families.  After all, my own grandparents did the same.  And there were rumors by some family members that they were “illegals,” but I rather doubt it.  They came through Ellis Island.  And I have copies of the ship’s manifest and their naturalization papers in my custody now. 

Healthcare and Congress:  Don’t know where I stand with this healthcare bill.  This nation cannot afford it, what with the $12.5 trillion debt as of several weeks past.  Yet I don’t believe businesses can continue funding employee health care insurance and maintain jobs, and the burden for total premium would be far too great for the worker.  And to penalize folks because they do not have insurance coverage (even though Mitt Romney’s state healthcare plan does the same in Massachusetts) does overstep the bounds of government.  BUT, on the other hand, I know what it’s like to be without insurance (through no fault of my own), deemed uninsurable and unable to pay $700-$800/month premiums for single person coverage, therefore doing without insurance and medical care, and ending up with cancer that could have been detected in early stage.

I am (as I have been for quite some time) sorely disappointed in 535 individuals:  The U.S. Congress.  I was hoping there would be greater emphasis on investigating the insurance, drug, and medical corporations.  What a rip-off!  I should have known better.  Instead, the Dems did their best to pay their allegiances to everybody but the U.S. taxpayers/citizens.  And the Repubs did little to nothing.  Who in heaven knows what is contained in that healthcare bill???  And how much of the information we’ve heard is actually misinformation, or disinformation?

The Debt:  While that $12-plus-trillion-and-climbing debt is alarming to me, I want to ask where were people when young Bush mounted two wars without raising a penny in taxes to pay for them, gave tax breaks to the top monied types, and spent dollars out the whazoo.  He ran up a debt far greater than any other president before him.  Where was the screaming and yelling and incivility then?  (Okay, I’ll admit, there was some incivility.)  Bush had eight years; Obama has had a little over one year (plus he did come into a mess).  But, definitely, some of Obama’s decisions have added to that mess.

I do believe the less government, the better.  But, given all this country has been through just in the last several years…sour and then (supposedly) near-collapse of economy, loss of businesses and jobs, people losing their livelihoods, their homes…I just dunno’.  Should government get out of the way and let the nation heal itself, or should the government (er, rather Wall Street) take the reins?  

We need to come together as a whole in America.  Quite frankly, sometimes I wonder if it’s not Obama’s skin color that provokes (to some degree) the nastiness being revealed in the country today.  Prejudice can be neatly wrapped in issues, and issues abound when there is a shortage of resources.  I  know that second statement will really raise the hackles of a lot of folks, but I do believe we have a long way to go in this country when it comes to dealing with racism.   We’ve got to realize that there is more that brings us together than tears us apart.  In my near 70 years, I’ve NEVER seen this country so divided.  I truly believe that if we don’t come together, we will end up in a civil war waged on the combined bases of class, religion, color, ethnicity, political viewpoints….  And I sincerely pray that it does not take another act of terror to bring us together. 

While I was accused of being unable to see the big picture, I have a different take.  I believe the old adage that “all politics is local.”  So, I’ve set my sights on doing what I can locally.  I cannot “fix” things at the national level without starting at home.  And I mean starting at home:  WITH ME.  While I’m not a Christian, I do often fall upon the teachings of Jesus as a guide for my behavior.  I must work on myself, and then do what I can for the community in which I live.  I also believe in the old saying “to each his own.”  The ‘Hidden Hippie’ in me says no one should be condemned for choosing how they wish to create a better world, as long as their efforts ARE creating a better world.  Disrespecting others, physical violence, being non-inclusionary, failing to see other points of view and becoming angry when others fail to see our point of view, etc. do nothing toward creating a better self, a better community, nation, or world.

Let us all work together in peace.